I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
