He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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