dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
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