My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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