So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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