Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Randomize
