Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Randomize
