Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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