what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
