I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
