wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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