i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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