mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
we're so committed to being not committed
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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