I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
