ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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