Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
