He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize