The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
