I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
