I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
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