Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
