So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Randomize
