so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
