That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
