...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
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