I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
