Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
