Ambien. No doubt about it.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
