I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
