so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
