we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
