no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
