Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
