i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I will pee on everything he values.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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