North Korea, Best Korea!
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Randomize
