I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
