So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
