let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
