So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
