Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
