She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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