I hope mine doesn't look like that
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize