I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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