so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
