kristin has been a bad kristin
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
