if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I think my moral compass just broke
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