My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
no, he came in my armpit
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
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