I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
