I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
