Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize